How To Move From Friends To Lovers – Dating To Relating For Men – 11/30/09

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DATING TO RELATING FOR MEN – WEEKLY COLUMN

Dating To Relating For Men – Advice By Mr. L. Rx

Released by AssociatedNews.US

Mr. L. Rx is the author of the popular DatingToRelating.com website and the author of the popular book “Dating To Relating – From A To Z.” Have a question? Send it to Column@DatingToRelating.com and it may be selected for answer in this column. (Sorry all questions can not be answered.)

Question: Mr. L. Rx, this girl at my school always plays with her hair when she talks to me. Other dating gurus have said this is a sign that a girl is flirting with you, but I am not sure. What do you think?

Answer: Well, I have heard the myth too, and it is mostly that – a myth. Most women play with their hair out of boredom. If you observe closely you will see that the women who play with their hair do it all the time in a lot of situations even when talking to other girls.

I think the myth got started because if you flirt back with a women who is bored who you think is flirting with you, she will probably get into it and flirt back with you, so it looks like she started it.

If you want to know if a women is flirting with you, there are a lot of better indicators than the “playing with her hair” thing.

Question: Mr. L. Rx, how do you convert a friendship into a lover?

Answer: The biggest mistake I see guys make who end up just being friends is to not “test the waters” romantically. Some guys are just friends with a girl and never make it known that they are interested in her romantically. They never flirt or do anything romantic. So they create a friendship and nothing else.

If you want a romantic relationship you have to let a girl know that is your intention even if you are “just friends.” Depending on how well you create the romantic part she might change her mind even if she originally just wanted to be friends.

The other mistake that I see a lot of guys make is to not recognize that the girl is absolutely not interested in them romantically. These are the guys that do make it known that they are interested in a romantic relationship but still get relegated to “just friends.”

Needless to say, these guys are usually making all kinds of “dating” mistakes.  They would stand a better chance if they backed off romance and concentrated more on just being friends.

Question: My best friend always interferes with me when I am approaching women. He will come over and start monopolizing the conversation to the point I can’t get a word in edgewise. What do I do?

Answer: Get a new best friend is the obvious answer. One that helps you meet women rather than hinder you. Short of that, turn the situation to your advantage. I had a friend who did the same thing to me. I would just point out hot girls to him and say “let’s go talk to her.”

He would do all the talking and I would just listen quietly, after about five minutes he would establish himself as a jerk to the girls and they would start talking to me to escape him. Worked every time and I never complained. The wrong thing to do is to compete with these kinds of guys. Either get new friends or learn to use their motion to your advantage.

Mr. L. Rx